Category Archives: Uncategorized

“Bad company corrupts good character.”  – 1 Corinthians 15:33 

A wise philosopher once said, “If you hang out with bad people, bad things are going to happen, but if you hang out with good people, good things are going to happen.”  I had the privilege of being acquainted with that wise philosopher a number of years ago.  His name was Robert, and Robert knew what he was talking about; for once upon a time, as he would be quick to admit, he had started hanging out with some bad people which led to a life of drug addiction, petty crime, and living on the streets.  Thankfully, though, Robert eventually met and began hanging out with some good people who helped him turn his life around into a one of sobriety, honest work, a roof over his head, and most importantly friends he could depend on to be a positive influence.

Many of us perhaps can identify with Robert’s story in that we have had some experience hanging out with both good and bad people.  I recall being in fifth grade when this new kid moved into our block.  I started hanging around him and thought he was one cool guy because, being two or three years older, he knew all sorts of “worldly” things I had never been exposed to.  My parents never said anything about my friendship with him, but being the good parents they were, maintained a watchful eye on the situation.  Soon, though, I realized that guy was not leading me down a good path.  And how did I know that?  Because up until then I had always hung out with good people, the same crowd to which I quickly returned.  Fortunately, that whole episode was short-lived, but it exposed me first-hand to what that wise philosopher Robert would put into words years later.

I don’t recall that neighbor kid ever asking or forcing me to do anything I shouldn’t have done.  It was just that hanging around him sort of rubbed off.  What ultimately kept me away from the trouble I could have gotten into is that hanging out with good people had rubbed off even more.  Isn’t that the way it seems to work, though, that our character develops not so much from what we are told or taught, but what simply rubs off?

“Bad company corrupts good character,” the Apostle Paul warned, just as that neighborhood kid almost did with me.  But that wise philosopher Robert would also testify that good company can have the opposite impact, transforming bad character into good.  What an awesome responsibility, that our own character rubs off on someone else!

“Now choose life . . .”  – Deuteronomy 30:19 

In his newly purchased sporty little car, my wife’s grandfather, Cecil Dye, set out on a rural highway for a test drive – or more to the point – to see how fast it would go; that is, until he topped a hill at just about max speed where a highway patrol car sat just waiting for him.  After receiving his speeding ticket Cecil looked up at the cop and asked in a smirky tone, “which direction are you headed from here?”  When the cop pointed in one direction Cecil nodded in the other, “then I’m going that way.”  It was Cecil’s clever way of getting the last lick in, or thinking he did at least, but I doubt it; for I have always pictured that cop walking back to his patrol car shaking his head with a big grin on his face, knowing full well Cecil was not done testing out his new sporty car.

Celebrating our fifty-first wedding anniversary over weekend reminded me of the many unexpected (and undeserved) bonuses that had come with the package of getting to spend my life with the love of my life.  Among them was Tee’s grandfather Cecil Dye who for twenty-five years was like a grandfather to me, filling a void I had felt in my life from the loss of my own grandfathers when I was a young child.

Cecil could hardly be described as the stereotypical rocking-chair-type grandfather; rather, he was the kind of grandfather who would buy a hot sporty car and take it out on a rural highway for a test spin at top speed, fearless of any cops who might be hiding over the top of a hill.  Notwithstanding such devilishness, he was anything but an outlaw, in fact quite to the contrary.  Cecil Dye was one of the most upright, moral, honest men I have ever known, smart, hard-working, and dedicated to family and community.  Though not a particularly religious man, at least not in a churchy kind of way, his best fishing buddy, who happened to be a local minister, insisted he had a deeper faith than his own.

Over our years together Cecil taught me many things, but most notably was his contagious zest for life like few people I have ever met.  I would like to think a little of that rubbed off, not just on me but on our whole family.  “Now choose life, so that you and your children may live,” he would likely advise if he could speak to us today, for that is what he did.  He chose life, even as he passed on to the next one, at age ninety-five.

“Cast your bread upon the waters, for after many days you will find it again.”

• Ecclesiastes 11:1 

A young rich man once questioned Jesus about what he must do to gain eternal life.  Jesus responded by telling him he lacked one thing, that he must sell all his possessions and give the proceeds to the poor.  But scriptures tell us, “When the man heard this, he went away sad, because he had great wealth.” 

It was not until I read Robert Kiyosaki’s book Rich Dad Poor Dad that I began to understand the full meaning of Jesus’ encounter with the rich young man.  The story goes something like this:  Kiyosaki had two father figures in his life, his “rich dad” who was his best friend’s father, and his “poor dad” who was his real father – although he was not actually poor.  In the book he explains the contrast between his two fathers in their attitude toward money, the rich dad being a successful entrepreneur while the poor dad worked for a salary, although a quite comfortable wage.  But the difference was that the rich dad viewed money – all things in life actually – as being abundantly available whether or not he possessed it at any given point in time.  His poor dad, on the other hand, viewed money as scarce, even though he earned a substantial salary.  “Rich Dad” had faith that given the abundance of creation he had the ability to produce wealth through hard work and his God-given ingenuity.  “Poor Dad”, however, was dependent on others to pay his wages.  And because of his faith “Rich Dad” was able to share generously with others, while “Poor Dad” gave only sparingly for fear of having nothing left from his limited resources.

“Rich Dad” was not rich because he always had money, nor was “Poor Dad” poor because he was broke.  Instead, “Rich Dad” was rich because he had faith, while “Poor Dad” was poor because – like the rich young man – he lacked faith.  “Rich Dad” lived out the proverb from Ecclesiastes: “Cast your bread upon the waters, for after many days you will find it again.”   And that is what Jesus had hoped for the rich young man he had encountered.  We are not called to hold back and play it safe, but to invest in life through faith; for that is the path to true riches.

“Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the whole duty of man.”

• Ecclesiastes 12:13 

True or false:  the one who dies with the most toys wins.  Or how about the one who has the most money wins?  What about the one who is the most brilliant and has the most advanced degrees, or the one who has reached the highest level in his or her organization, the one who has traveled the most, has the most beautiful wife or debonair husband, the best athlete, the most talented artist or musician, has won the most awards, become the most famous or the most powerful?  In the end who wins?

These are not a trick questions, and we probably all know the correct answer to be none of the above, yet in our consumeristic culture most of us struggle to live that way.  But who does win in the end?  Before we answer that let’s explore a little further.

A man who wrestled mightily with this question was none other than King Solomon, the wisest and richest man who ever lived, and though he had everything and tried almost everything both good and bad, toward the end of his life he came to the conclusion that nothing – I mean nothing – on this earth can fully satisfy a human’s desire for complete fulfillment.  “Meaningless! . . . Utterly meaningless!  Everything is meaningless . . . a chasing after the wind,” he declared in his essay we know as the Book of Ecclesiastes.

Alcoholics, so they say, are not people who drink too much; rather people who can never drink enough; meaning their thirst for alcohol – their addiction – can never be satisfied.  So it is with every earthly desire, as Solomon declares, no matter how much or how little we have it is never enough.  Our thirst – our desire for fulfillment – is never satisfied no matter how much we gain, attain, or accomplish.

So, in the end who wins?  It is not the one with the most stuff, the best things or the most accomplishments.  Rather, it is the one with the most gratitude.  The one who wins is the one who is thankful for whatever he or she has – and especially thankful to God for providing it.  “Fear God and keep his commandments,” Solomon concluded at the end of his essay, “for this is the whole duty of man.” It is grateful people are able to experience a sense of fulfillment in this life, and ultimately the ones who win in the end.

“. . . seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.”  Matthew 6:33 

One of the great challenges we faced working on a bond trading desk in the Wall Street world, as I did for thirty years, was the urgency of everything.  Phones rang non-stop during trading hours and every one of those calls was something urgent.  While in one sense the high level of activity was energizing and exciting (one never lacked for something to do).  On the other hand – and this was the challenging part – it was easy to get caught up in the frenzy – the urgency – and lose sight of the greater purpose, the mission and goals of the business.

Among his countless nuggets of wisdom the late management guru of the twentieth century, the great Peter Drucker, emphasized the importance of making the “important” rather than the “urgent” our priority in life.  But like most of us he struggled with it too.  “If I look back,” he once lamented, “my greatest frustrations are probably, in retrospect, this is hindsight, that I have, far too often, made the urgent rather than the important my priority and that as a result, some of the books I should have written I haven’t written.  And I have written books that were urgent, or I have taught the things that they needed at the moment rather than the things that were needed five years since.  I have been willing to run shorter rather than long-term.”

It’s a tough call because urgent matters do matter, but they should never be allowed to cause us to lose sight of the greater purpose and the longer-term mission.  That is why clear concise mission and vision statements are so critical for organizations and that that mission and vision be instilled in the organization’s culture.  Thus, the most successful organizations over the long haul are those who do.

Jesus himself reminded us that we should first seek God’s kingdom – the “important” – then deal with the other matters of life – the “urgent”.  By doing so we guard ourselves from being caught up in the frenzy of the urgent; or as Drucker put it, we must make the “important” rather than the “urgent” our priority in life.