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“The Lord disciplines those he loves, as a father the son he delights in.” – Proverbs 3:12 

“Let me tell you a secret about a father’s love / a secret that my daddy said was just between us. / Daddies don’t just love their children every now and then. / It’s a love without end, amen.”  Leave it to that wise philosopher, country singer George Strait; for no one could have described a father’s love for his children any better than he did in that great hit song.

My own dad was like that.  He didn’t just love my brother and me every now and then, meaning only when we were good enough or made him proud.  I can’t speak for my brother, but God knows there were plenty of occasions when I didn’t deserve his love, yet he loved me anyway, even when I needed to be disciplined.  And there were, in fact, occasions when my dad’s greatest expressions of love, as they should have been, came in the form of discipline rather than affection.

I will never forget the last time I was ever disciplined by my father.  I was a grown man by then, married with a family, and about to start a career.  I had two job offers in hand, and I was sure I was making the right choice when the phone rang and I heard my dad’s voice on the other end, except he didn’t sound like his usual jovial and friendly self, but business-like, stern and to the point.  I should rethink my decision, he stated firmly, else I could be passing up the career opportunity of a lifetime.  For once I didn’t argue, just listened, the whole conversation lasting no longer than two or three minutes.  When it was over all I remember saying was, “Thanks, I’ll think about it.”  My dad was right that day, his words prophetic, like the voice of God – and I give thanks every day for the way my life has turned out, and especially for that last time he disciplined me.

“The Lord disciplines those he loves, as a father the son he delights in.”  My dad disciplined me that day, not because he was angry, but because he loved me and delighted in me, plus he knew my potential and had more confidence in me than I had in myself at that time.  You see, “Daddies don’t just love their children every now and then.  It’s a love without end, amen.”  Happy Father’s Day to all my fellow fathers and grandfathers out there.  And please join me in expressing gratitude for all the ones who have gone before.  Theirs’ was a love without end, wasn’t it?  Do I hear a big AMEN?

“For everything there is a season, and a time for every purpose under heaven.”

• Ecclesiastes 3:1 (ASV) 

Sometimes the counsel we offer someone else turns out to be exactly what we need to hear ourselves.  It happened to me a number of years ago.  A friend approached me whose daughter, his first-born, had graduated from high school and would soon be heading off to college.  My friend was agonizing over the emptiness created by his daughter leaving home.  Since my own children were a few years older he knew I had experienced the same emotions and wondered how I had handled it.  “Don’t worry,” I assured him, “your life will soon be filled with new activities such as going to visit your daughter at college.”  “Ah!” he replied as his whole demeanor suddenly shifted from sadness to excitement, “so now we can start looking forward to more road trips.”  “Exactly,” I said.

I doubt my friend would remember that very brief conversation from all those years ago, but I do; for ironically, what I told him were the exact words I needed to hear with my own ears, that life consists of constantly changing seasons for each of us, and with each change, as with all transitions, come feelings of sadness and loss and nostalgia, even pain and suffering at times, but also hope and renewal, joy and excitement.

In 2008, after a hard-fought battle with cancer, Tee lost her dad, my father-in-law and the last among our four parents and our children’s grandparents.  It had been a sad and difficult journey – the end of a season.  Then, suddenly it seemed, the season changed only a few short weeks later with the arrival of our first grandchild, then the second only three weeks after that.  Later, Tee wrote these beautiful words to a friend, “Little did I know the journey God was going to send me on in the last few months.  It has been a walk with the past, the present, and the future, and a lesson in the completeness of life.”

“For everything there is a season, and a time for every purpose under heaven.”  Thousands of years ago the author of Ecclesiastes wrote those words, yet that is what I was reminded of in my own words I spoke to my friend that day.  Like a road trip, the seasons of life take us on a journey with the past, the present, and future, ever teaching us about and leading us toward that completeness of life we all long for.

“Build up, build up, prepare the road!  Remove the obstacles out of the way of my people.” – Isaiah 57:14 

Did you ever know someone who just seemed to constantly cause trouble?  I remember this kid when I was growing up, I’ll call him Sam (not his real name) to try to protect his identity.  Perhaps the best way to describe Sam, who was a year or two younger than me, is that he was one of those kids who spent more time in the principal’s office than in the classroom, which was true from elementary all the way through high school.  Very bright, as I recall, but always into mischief.  To be fair, in today’s world Sam would have been diagnosed with ADHD and treated medically for that condition.  But in those days no one knew or understood such disorders, they were simply labeled as troublemakers.  Poor Sam!  I don’t know what ever became of him, but I hope at some point he was able to re-channel his talent and energy in more productive ways.

A good friend of mine once suggested there are two kinds of people, those who create problems like Sam was notorious for, and those who fix problems like my late brother-in-law Chuck who, amazingly, could fix anything – plumbing, electrical, mechanical, carpentry – you name it.  And he didn’t just fix things like new, as we often say, he fixed them better than new with better parts and extraordinarily better craftsmanship.  I doubt there has ever been a tool invented he didn’t know how to use.  And unlike Sam who spent most of his school days in the principal’s office, judging by the certificates hanging on his walls Chuck spent most of his school days – not to mention his Scouting days, Navy days, corporate days, and community service days – on stage receiving awards for his fine work and accomplishments.

But it is not the awards and certificates and recognition that matter so much to people like Chuck, and others who dedicate themselves to fixing problems rather than creating them.  No, fixers fix things because of their desire to leave the world better than they found it, which they inevitably do.  The prophet Isaiah wrote that we should “Build up, build up, prepare the road!  Remove the obstacles out of the way of my people.”  Which leads to the question we must all ask ourselves, “will I spend my days being a troublemaker, leaving messes to be cleaned up and obstacles to be stumbled over, or will I use my time on earth clearing the path so those who follow might have a smoother journey?”

“But many who are first will be last, and the last first.”  – Mark 10:31 

“The last in line doesn’t ever make the team / Doesn’t get a second chance / Doesn’t find a field of dreams / The last in line doesn’t get a special prize / Doesn’t ever hear his name / You don’t look him in the eyes / Nobody wants to be the last in line.”  (Song lyrics by songwriter and singer Billy Crockett, “The Last in Line”) 

No one likes to be last in line, or last at anything for that matter.  We learn that at a young age, in simple games, on the playground, in the classroom, from a game of Old Maid or checkers.  We want to win the game, be the fastest in the race, the top student in the class.  It’s a great thing the competitive spirit, the desire to achieve, to be the best, to come in first, to win the prize.  Such desires inspire us to perform at our best and to work at becoming even better.  It is this spirit that drives achievement, success, innovative ideas, inventions, better and more efficient ways of doing things, all of which can make the world a better place.  So, being first in line is something we should all aim for, as long as we don’t forget those who are last in line.

My good friend Tommy was that kind of person, a high achiever, brilliant businessman and corporate leader, a fierce competitor whose wealth grew, as you can imagine, to be fairly substantial.   Tommy and I became friends serving on a mission team for several years making annual excursions to Honduras where we worked among the poorest of the poor.  Tommy was the kind of guy who would always volunteer for the most backbreaking jobs like laying bricks or pouring concrete from a heavy wheelbarrow.  But the thing I remember most about Tommy was how at the end of the day before we left the worksite, he would take off his shoes, clean them up, then give them away to someone who needed them more than he did, after which he would quietly walk away – barefoot.  Tommy was a winner, but he never forgot those who were last in line.

When Tommy passed away a few years ago, I had this image of him stepping into God’s Kingdom exactly the way he left Honduras – barefoot.  But instead of being first in line he stepped back a few spaces to help someone else get ahead, someone who just happened to be wearing the shoes he had given away. “But many who are first will be last, and the last first.”  And that’s just as it should be.

“From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded . . .” – Luke 12:48 

As a high school graduation gift back in 1992, our older son received a copy of the Dr. Seuss book Oh, the Places You’ll Go.  At that time the book had only been in publication maybe a couple of years, probably one of the final works of Theodor Seuss Geisel (Dr. Seuss) who died in 1991.  I had never read it until our son received it as a gift, and so intrigued was I by its message that our younger son presented me with my own copy a few weeks later as a Father’s Day gift.

“For out-starting upstarts of all ages, here is a wonderfully wise and blessedly brief graduation speech from the one and only Dr. Seuss,” the book cover describes this masterfully illustrated little poem about life.  “In his inimitable, humorous verse and pictures he addresses the Great Balancing Act (life itself, and the ups and downs it presents) while encouraging us to find the success that lies within us.”  What a great message for those transitioning into new careers, higher levels of education, or a new season of life.  No wonder that each year around this time, graduation season, Oh, the Places You’ll Go still rises back into the ranks of bestsellers.  I know I still cherish my copy and read and refer to it frequently.

What parent, grandparent, teacher, or coach does not dream for the child they helped raise, teach, coach, influence or encourage to become successful, however defined?  Of course we do.  But we do not wish for them success simply for the sake of success.  Say, for example, a child has potential to become a great violinist.  Who among us would wish for that child to become a great musician only to perform in a vacuum, rather than for others to enjoy and be inspired by?

Jesus says that “From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded.”  Such is the point He was making in the parable of the talents where one servant was entrusted with five talents, another servant with two, and another with one.  The servants given the five talents and the two invested wisely and doubled what they had, thus were entrusted with more to manage.  But the servant with one kept his in a vacuum, so to speak, and so he lost what little he had.  Success for the sake of success sits in a vacuum, until it is shared for the benefit of others.  And when it is, “oh, the places you will go!”