“. . . let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven.”  – Matthew 5:16 

Regardless whether we are rich or poor, educated or illiterate, brilliant or simple, young or old, we all influence the lives of those with whom we come in contact in some way.  Influence is perhaps the most powerful of all human social characteristics in that anything we say or do may shape the life of someone else, often without our being aware.

Once, many years ago, while attending a large gathering I overheard a man telling someone else that he was in the process of changing careers, one that on the one hand would limit his income but on the other would allow him the freedom to do those things that are more meaningful and significant.  I’m quite sure that gentleman never knew there was someone eavesdropping, nor did he realize that what he said would powerfully influence the life of a bystander.  But it was in that moment that a seed was planted in my mind that began the process of my own career change some years later.

Who’s listening when we speak?  Who’s watching what we do?  Who’s observing our everyday lives?  Who’s overhearing our conversations?  For better or worse, who are we influencing and in what way?  It is sobering to realize the power we have to influence good or evil, success or failure, hope or despair, inspiration or disappointment.

Like the man whose conversation I inadvertently overheard at a party we seldom realize the far-reaching impact of our influence.  Perhaps that is even more reason to be conscious of the awesome responsibility we have in what we say and how we behave, for every word we speak and every action we take inevitably shapes the life of another.

There’s a quote I once read attributed to John Quincy Adams.  “The influence of each human being on others in this life is a kind of immortality,” he said.  Jesus put it another way, “. . . let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven.”

“Now choose life, so that your children may live . . .”  – Deuteronomy 30:19 

I am of an age, I’m afraid, where attending funerals has become all too frequent, as has reading the obituary columns become part of my daily routine, not only in search of people I might know, but as the old joke goes, to check and see if my own name happens to appear there.  It is all part of the life cycle I suppose.

As it may seem like a morbid topic to write about, obituaries and funerals, allow me to be a little more specific.  The ones I am referring to are people who have lived full, rich lives, not those tragic instances that seem to occur way too often among the young and innocent.  Like everyone else, I can’t get my arms around those events either, and often find myself railing at God about why such things happen.

Rather, I’m speaking about people like Shirley, the mother of one of our good friends, and a beloved friend of ours as well, and distinctively one of the funniest human beings I have ever known, with a sense of humor that, though laced with sarcasm, would have you rolling with laughter.  Few were those who escaped her taunts and gibes, nor were many quick enough to respond with a clever comeback.  In fact, I would list among my best days those rare occasions when I was able to get one over on Shirley.  Touché!

Yet, Shirley was also one of the kindest, most caring, hospitable, and loving people I have ever known, and a person of deep faith.  As a mother, grandmother, and great-grandmother she was second to none, loving her family deeply, including her late husband of whom she adoringly spoke frequently. When she passed away a few years ago a large crowd gathered at the church for her funeral service.  And while it was certainly a reverent occasion as it should have been, neither was it solemn.  In fact, laughter filled that church like I had never witnessed at any funeral service, as one Shirley story was told after another.  And believe me, there were plenty to go around.

“I have set before you life and death,” Moses instructed the Israelites toward the end of his life, “Now choose life, so that you and your children may live and that you may love the Lord your God.”  Shirley chose life and lived it to the full, a gift to all of us who had the good fortune of crossing paths with her – taunts and gibes and all.

“Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.”  – Luke 23:34 

I must confess that I have succumbed to being a bit of a Jack Reacher junkie in recent months, Jack Reacher, in case you are not familiar, being the main character in a series of popular crime thrillers by British novelist Lee Child.  A giant of a man – six-five, two-fifty, and former major in the army’s military police – Reacher’s post-military life consists of roaming from place to place, yet no place in particular, mostly by Greyhound bus, where he inevitably crosses paths with someone who needs help against some bad characters.  Not one to shy away from trouble, Reacher comes to the victims’ rescue where he employs his brawn, martial arts skills, street smarts, and law enforcement savvy to save the day.

Besides being classic good versus evil stories, what is so addictive about Reacher is that while he is never one to start a fight, neither does he back away, nor does he ever lose one – ever! – often taking on as many as eight or ten at a time.  (Not someone you want to encounter in a dark alley, unless he is on your side.)  And in the end, you can be assured that Reacher is going make things right for the victims he is defending.

I must confess, the real reason I am such a Reacher junkie is because I am entertained by the violence, a big guy beating up a bunch of thugs who deserve everything they get.  I suppose that is why good versus evil stories have always been so popular.

We love to cheer for people like Reacher, and all the other heroic cops and soldiers in the TV shows and movies we watch.  But what about those like Ghandi and Martin Luther King, Jr., also valiant warriors against evil, but whose methods were insistently nonviolent?  And what about Jesus who refused to resist his executioners despite his innocence?  “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing,” he prayed from the cross.  Yet, did not Jesus, Ghandi, and King defeat evil as surely as Reacher?

But we are entertained by the violence because it is easier and seems more fair, the bad guys getting their due.  Except for one difference.  In one instance violence eradicates the evildoers, but in the other nonviolence might actually win them over.  The first method is classic win-lose.  But Jesus’ method is win-win, and that is a radically different outcome.

“Which of these . . . do you think was a neighbor to the man? . . . The one who had mercy on him.”   –  Luke 10:36-37 

We once owned a small cattle ranch.  One fall afternoon we were about to leave the ranch when we noticed one of our young heifers lying on the ground tangled up in a hay ring.  How she got that way is anybody’s guess, but I suppose the hay was so tasty that she simply wanted to crawl inside the metal ring and wallow in it, like we sometimes do with a bowl of ice cream that is so delicious we wish we could jump in the bowl and swim in it.  Anyway, we needed to get that poor cow untangled and set her free, but the challenge was that neither the steel ring nor the cow’s leg was very flexible.

Fortunately, this whole incident occurred at the front of our property about twenty yards from the highway where we noticed a car had pulled off the side of the road and this fellow was climbing over the fence.  “Ya’ll need some help?” he asked as he studied the young heifer’s predicament while lighting up a Marlboro.  Lonnie was his name, he said, and he was headed to work in the nearby village where he was employed at a deer processing facility (only in rural Texas!).  His car was old and dented up, his clothes were dirty and tattered, he had on a pair of ragged rubber boots with his pants tucked inside.  And as I recall he didn’t smell very good.  You get the picture?  But that day Lonnie was an angel, our Good Samaritan; for without Lonnie’s help I’m not sure we would have ever been able to untangle that poor cow from the hay ring and get her back on her feet.

Among the many parables Jesus told, none is as often quoted as the story of the Good Samaritan.  It is about a man lying on the side of the road, robbed, beaten, and left for dead until a stranger happened by, saw his predicament, treated his wounds, and carried him to safety.  But Jesus added one other small subtle detail, that the stranger also happened to be a Samaritan, who in those days was an outcast from society.  (In case you didn’t pick up on it, Lonnie was probably an outcast from society as well.)

Seems to me, the moral of the story of the Good Samaritan points out the most basic humanitarian act any of us can ever do, that is to have compassion and provide help when we see a fellow human being in need, no matter which side of the tracks they are from.  Who is our neighbor?  The one who shows mercy, and Lonnie was our neighbor that day.

“. . . seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.”  Matthew 6:33 

One of the great challenges we faced back in the days when I was working on a bond trading desk in the Wall Street world, as I did for thirty years, was the urgency of everything.  Phones rang non-stop during trading hours and every one of those calls was something urgent, which was the nature of the business.  And while in one sense the high level of activity was energizing and exciting (one never lacked for something to do).  On the other hand – and this was the challenging part – it was easy to get caught up in the frenzy – the urgency – and lose sight of the greater purpose and the mission and goals of the business.

Among his countless nuggets of wisdom the late management guru of the twentieth century, the great Peter Drucker, emphasized the importance of making the “important” rather than the “urgent” our priority in life.  But like most of us he struggled with it too.  “If I look back,” he once lamented, “my greatest frustrations are probably, in retrospect, this is hindsight, that I have, far too often, made the urgent rather than the important my priority and that as a result, some of the books I should have written I haven’t written.  And I have written books that were urgent, or I have taught the things that they needed at the moment rather than the things that were needed five years since.  I have been willing to run shorter rather than long-term.”

It’s a tough call because urgent matters do matter, but they should never be allowed to cause us to lose sight of the greater purpose and the longer-term mission.  That is why clear concise mission and vision statements are so critical for organizations and that that mission and vision be instilled in the organization’s culture.  Thus, the most successful organizations over the long haul are those who do.

Jesus himself reminded us that we should first seek God’s kingdom – the “important” – then deal with the other matters of life – the “urgent”.  By doing so we guard ourselves from being caught up in the frenzy of the urgent; or as Drucker put it, we must make the “important” rather than the “urgent” our priority in life.