“The way of a fool seems right to him, but a wise man listens to advice.” Proverbs 12:15 

I have tried it both ways, and without question listening to advice always leads to better outcomes, even when I disagree or choose not to follow it.  As a young man starting out I once had two job offers, and being naïve as I was back then, chose the one I thought was most suitable for me.  A few days later I received a phone call from my dad, who rarely imposed his opinions on my decisions as an adult.  But on this particular occasion he insisted in no uncertain terms that I was making a huge mistake and should reconsider my decision.  Perhaps it was because I was caught off guard by my dad’s uncharacteristic intervention that I could hardly do anything except hear him out, after which I did reconsider.  That intervention was a beautiful gift from my dad.  And one of the greatest favors I ever did for myself was following his sage advice.

Fast forward several years when I was well established in that career, having achieved enough success where my ego had grown a bit too large, along came another job offer.  This was the career opportunity of a lifetime, so I thought.  But just before I accepted the offer an older and wiser friend took me to lunch one day to warn me that I might be making a mistake.  This time, though, convinced I knew better, I ignored his advice.  What a fool I was for not listening, a mistake that almost destroyed my career.

The story is told that during the American Civil War President Lincoln decided to make a certain strategic move with the Union Army.  But when secretary of war, Edwin Stanton, received the order from the President he refused to carry it out declaring that the President was a fool.  “If Stanton said I’m a fool,” Lincoln replied, “then it must be, for he is always right.”  After further discussion between the two Lincoln realized Stanton was indeed right, and that his decision would have been a colossal mistake.

All of us suffer blind spots in our thinking and perspective from time to time.  The best way to avoid them is by listening to the advice and counsel of others, whether we ultimately agree or disagree.  Either way, simply listening to other ideas and perspectives can help identify and avoid blind spots.  Yet, failure to do so can greatly increase the odds of making foolish choices and sometimes colossal mistakes.  As the old proverb says, “The way of a fool seems right to him, but a wise man listens to advice.”

“He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm.”  

• Proverbs 13:20 

Didn’t our parents warn us over and over about running around with the wrong crowd?  Sometimes it just happens, though, we let our guard down for whatever reason and make a bad choice of companions.  Other times we may end up in a bad crowd through no fault of our own.  Either way can be trouble if we are not careful.  When I was in college I had a part time job working for an employer who hired a lot of college students like myself.  Most were good kids who got along well.  But once there was this new guy who came on board, and as always I tried to become buddies with him, until one day I made the mistake of getting in the car with him to go to lunch.  That’s when something didn’t feel right.  Next thing I knew we were in some loud joint ordering burgers and beer and shooting pool.  We returned to work late and with beer on our breath, for which both of us could have – and should have – been fired.  But, thankfully, for whatever reason our boss looked the other way.  I knew then and there that hanging out with that guy was not a good idea.  Sooner or later bad things were going to happen.

“When you hang out with good people good things gonna happen, and when you hang out with bad people bad things gonna happen.”  Such were the wise words of Robert Cook, one of the greatest “street” philosophers I ever met.  And Robert knows.  He earned his philosophy degree from the school of life experience; for it was hanging out with bad people that once led him to a life of drug addiction, homelessness, and crime that resulted in spending time in prison.  But then he met some good people and started hanging out with them, and that’s what turned his life around leading him into recovery and re-entry into a stable and productive life where he spends much of his spare time today volunteering in his church and reaching out to others who are bumping along rock bottom as he once did.

The Biblical proverb teaches us that “He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm.”  But only a great street philosopher like Robert Cook can bring it down to earth where the rubber meets the road: “When you hang out with good people good things gonna happen, and when you hang out with bad people bad things gonna happen.”

“You are the God who performs miracles.”  Psalm 77:14 

An article in the May issue of Guideposts magazine caught my eye the other day, a story about a single mother named Jocelynn who had lost everything – her marriage, home, job, car, and even her family – due to her addiction to drugs.  Over the course of five years she had been arrested sixteen times for various offences from drug possession to possession of stolen property to credit card fraud.  Several of those arrests were made by the same police officer, Officer Terrell Potter.  Finally, in 2012 after spending several months behind bars, Jocelynn had hit rock bottom, sought help, entered rehab and got herself clean, after which she committed her life to helping other addicts find sobriety, particularly women.  She has since helped hundreds recover from addiction.  But that’s not all.  One day she learned that Officer Potter who had arrested her numerous times was in need of a kidney.  You guessed it, Jocelynn was a perfect match, and today Terrell Potter is alive and healthy thanks to the woman he had hauled off in handcuffs many times.  After reading that article I thought, only God could perform such a miracle.

Near our home is a gorgeous trail that leads back into some woods along a series of small lakes where for the second spring in a row a pair of migratory geese have nested in the same spot to hatch their eggs.  Sure enough, several days ago we spotted the two geese swimming in the pond with three babies in tow.  Over the decades and centuries science has discovered much about the process of reproduction and how cells come together to grow into new life.  Yet, I recall how awed I was when my own children were born, and maybe even more so the births of my grandchildren, how those tiny cells formed into a human being who talks and thinks and laughs and cries.  Anytime I witness new life I cannot help but marvel that only God could perform such a miracle.

Some dispute the existence of miracles, that if something cannot be explained through science and logic that it simply isn’t so; that is, if it is too good to be true it must not be true.  Even the stories above can be validated a great deal by science.  What it cannot explain is the redemption of Jocelynn and the subsequent bond between she and Officer Potter.  Nor can it explain the awe we experience when we witness new life.  Yes, science may be able to explain much about the mysteries of Creation, but it cannot explain miracles.  For as the Psalmist says, “You are the God who performs miracles.”

 “. . . in humility consider others better than yourselves.”  – Philippians 2:3 

Having worked over thirty years in sales organizations I observed there are two types of salespeople.  There is the salesperson who works for himself, and the one who works for the customer.  More bluntly, there is the one who works for commissions, and the one who works for the good of the clients.  Both, of course, clearly understand their compensation is tied directly to the transaction.  The distinction is that the former is motivated by the compensation he will receive, while the latter is motivated by doing what is best for the customer.

In his book, Give and Take, Wharton Business School professor Adam Grant sets out to explore how a person’s intentions impacts his or her long-term success.  In his research he categorizes people this way: “Givers”, those who are genuinely generous in their behavior; “Takers”, those who tend to be in it for themselves; but he also includes those who he labels as “Matchers”, who often behave like “givers” but with an expectation of reciprocity or quid pro quo.  What he concludes is that “takers” often jump ahead of the pack early on, while “matchers” simply know how to play the game.  But in the long run it is the “givers” who are most likely to rise to the top and grow to become real leaders.

This principle, of course, is not limited just to the sales profession, as all careers and professions are impacted by it, in fact it is true about all endeavors.  Once I was taking a public speaking course when the obvious question arose from our class about how to overcome stage fright when speaking before an audience.  The instructor’s answer was surprisingly simple.  We become frightened, he explained, because we are focused on ourselves, how we appear and what the audience is thinking about us.  Focus instead, he instructed, on the audience and the message you are offering.  The distinction is that the stage-frightened speaker is a “taker”, motivated by how he or she is perceived by the audience.  The confident speaker, though, is a “giver”, motivated by what he or she is doing for the audience.

The Apostle Paul could not have summed it up more succinctly, “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves.”

“I saw that there is nothing better for a man than to enjoy his work.” – Ecclesiastes 3:22 

What motivates you more, the demands of others or desire for achievement?  My own response to that question goes back to my experience working for Bobby Fuller, the supervisor where I was employed part time during my last two years of college.  The job itself was more or less an assembly line operation that required only a moderate amount of skill, all of which was learned on the job.  It was Bobby who taught me everything, how to operate all the machines in the plant and how to perform every job function, so that in a short time I became fairly proficient at most of them.  It was, however, boring work for the most part, not exactly what I wanted to do the rest of my life.  Yet, I can’t remember a single day I did not look forward to going to work.  Bobby was the kind of guy who just made you feel appreciated, and I worked hard for him.  Everybody did.

At the same time I was working part time for Bobby I was spending the rest of my days across town on the campus of The University of Texas in Austin completing my degree in business and finance.   And it was, coincidentally, during those same years when Theory X and Theory Y management styles happened to be getting a lot of attention in business academia and corporate circles.  They were fairly new concepts back then (by that name at least) having been developed in the 1960’s by Douglas McGregor of MIT’s Sloan School of Management.  Essentially what the two theories suggest is this:  Theory X, which assumes people are inherently lazy and hate work, requires that managers must rely heavily on threat and coercion in order to motivate employees.  Theory Y, on the other hand, assumes people are naturally ambitious and actually enjoy work, thus respond well to positive motivation.  Using the metaphor of either the carrot or the stick, in other words, Theory Y might represent the carrot and Theory X the stick.

I am pretty sure Bobby Fuller never heard of Theories X and Y.  He did, however, seem to instinctively understand the power of positive motivation, through which he became quite effective in raising the level of productivity even in that mundane assembly line operation; for he had a way of creating such an upbeat environment that everyone enjoyed working there.  I know I did.  King Solomon once observed, “I saw that there is nothing better for a man than to enjoy his work.”  Thus, understanding that concept, Bobby employed a Theory Y leadership style as effectively as anyone I have ever known.